Review - Escaping The Merman by Aramis Jordan
Deliciously daft fantasy de(mer)tailing, at some length, the torrid affair between husky merchant seaman, Fernando, and Arian, a sultry merman. At this point, I have to confess I hadn't cottoned on to the fact this was a Little Mermaid retelling, but a very loose one (rather like Fernando's backside, by the end of this book.)
Any resemblance to the Disney version stops at the first page, although Arian does profess he wants to learn more about books and all kinds of human culture. He's an intelligent creature who is constantly sexually frustrated, thanks to an ancient curse. When he sees Fernando, he is determined he is the one to pop his clam, so to speak. The only problem is, Fernando is straight.
Is he fuck. It doesn't take long before Fernando is spread out like limp seaweed on a rock, being prostate-milked by the lusty Arian. Yes, back up a minute, I said "prostate milked." I didn't know this was a thing at the start of this book. Now I'm a goddamned expert, thanks to the first of some very long and mighty detailed sex scenes.
Kind of too long, to be honest, as by the time you finish reading, you forget where you are in the story. I had to look up prostate-milking, to see if it was a thing. (It is) and checked with my lovely male gay friends to see if the prostate is really the male version of the clitoris (it isn't.) I know this is a fantasy, but this was a distracting detail.
Moving on. Fernando leaves Arian to go back home, heartbroken and confused. Arian decides to go after him and, just as in the story, he visits the Malik the Sea Witch (who I loved) to get him some legs. I won't say more as it will spoil it. Malik is easily the most interesting character; camp, bitchy, sexy and wicked.
The writing was good, or I would have bailed at the unfortunate "winking ring of muscle" description. I was curious to see where this would go. There was potential for an erotic tail without penetrative sex, but this didn't happen, and I felt the denouement was a sell-out. Even so, Fernando and Arian were a likeable couple, and I liked the way Fernando didn't angst too much over the hoary old "but I'm straight!" chestnut, as that had been well and truly squashed by Chapter 4.
As I said, deliciously daft and very sexy in places, though I became really tired of the word "prostate" by the end of the book. A sexy fairytale set in colonial times, with great characters and authentic language. I can see why it was popular but in the end, I didn't have a whale of a time reading it. Sorry...
BLURB
AA handsome sailor who thinks he’s straight. A beautiful merman driven by desire. Sailor Fernando knows he’s in trouble when his ship runs into a merman colony. Infamous for luring in ships with their ethereal song, mermen are feared. Fernando tries to escape, but when he lays eyes on gorgeous merman Arian, he wonders: does he even want to get away? Arian loves men and cannot believe his luck when a ship sails into his archipelago. When his gaze falls on Fernando, Arian wants him and no one else. But mermen are dark creatures, and it’s not a question if things will go wrong—it’s when. Escaping the Merman is a 70,000 word gay-for-you romance with a dark side. It features an intense love story and plenty of steam. This MM paranormal romance can be read as a standalone (HEA guaranteed) and is part of the Cursed Mermen series. Buy Escaping the Merman to dip into this fantasy romance today!